Catblogging Time!

It’s been awhile since I’ve given you poor souls anything other than pollyticks, and poor fare at that.  Have some kitteh!

Here’s kitteh sleeping uncompromisingly on the Bible:

She still refuses to stand uncompromisingly on it, silly beast.

Her appreciation for the pillow-like qualities of religious texts does not end with the Bible.  Indeed, she can be a proper Zen kitty when she likes:

Apparently, she’ll lounge unashamedly and uncompromisingly on any book I set within her reach, because she was at geology this morning.  Alas, I didn’t have the camera.

As you can see, she has no problem lounging uncompromisingly on the book I’m writing as well, but only when I’m actually trying to scribble something.

As you can see, this leads to writing as a performance art, because I have to become a contortionist to accomplish it.

And then there’s times when I just have to give up altogether, because when you have a purring bundle of fur stretched out right across what you’re trying to work with, well, all you can do is pat it until it gets sick of the attention and goes away.

At least I finally found an actual cat toy she’ll play with.  Sometimes, I’ll see the little string on its pole bob like a fish has just taken the line, and I know that at long last, I have fulfilled my duties as a cat owner.  At least until the next belly rub is required.

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Dumbfuckery du Jour

Desperate times call for desperate measures, as we all know.  And Cons are desperate.  They lost the health care reform battle.  The nutjobs they’ve whipped into a frenzy are making them look worse.  The “bu-bu-but we get a few death threats too!” defense isn’t really working out too well.  So what’s a Con to do?

Why, whine, lie, and play the victim, of course!

You see, health care reform is racist:

The recently passed health care reform act includes a 10 percent tax on indoor tanning salons to help pay for expanded insurance coverage for millions of Americans. Radio host Doc Thompson, subbing in for Fox News host Glenn Beck on his radio show today, used the tax to make the absurd accusation that the health bill is somehow “racist”:

For years I’ve suggested that racism was in decline and yeah, there are some, you know, incidents that still happen with regards to racism, but most of the claims I’ve said for years, well, they’re not really real. But I realize now that I was wrong. For I now too feel the pain of racism. Racism has been dropped at my front door and the front door of all lighter-skinned Americans. The health care bill the president just singed into law includes a 10 percent tax on all indoor tanning sessions starting July 1st, and I say, who uses tanning? Is it dark-skinned people? I don’t think so. I would guess that most tanning sessions are from light-skinned Americans. Why would the President of the United Stats of America — a man who says he understands racism, a man who has been confronted with racism — why would he sign such a racist law? Why would he agree to do that? Well now I feel the pain of racism.

Oh, the horror!  Oh, the sting!  Oh, the humanity!  I mean, there’s really nothing worse than being forced to pay a 10% tax on a tanning session.  Forget lynching, beatings, denial of services, denial of opportunity, being singled out for police brutality and pulled over for the crime of being black in the wrong neighborhood, forget unequal treatment in courts, running gauntlets of rabid racists, and all that other stuff like increased risk of being murdered, dying of treatable disease, etc. etc. that one may suffer by dint of non-white skin pigmentation.  None of that compares to the pain of a 10% tax on tanning sessions.

I mean, honestly, people, that’s like $5 – $6 per month if you sign up for an unlimited package!  Can’t you understand how awful that is?

No?

Well, it’s like totally the only racism currently going on in America.  I mean, all those stories you heard about how Congressmen voting for the health care reform bill got racial epithets thrown at them – that’s like total lies and stuff.  I know cuz Michele Bachmann sed so:

Oh, Michele Bachmann, is there anything you won’t say out loud?

Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-Minn.) told a crowd at a Duluth, Minn., rally over the weekend that there is no evidence that several black lawmakers were harassed by conservative protesters on Capitol Hill in the days leading up to the health care reform vote.

Black lawmakers, including civil rights icon Rep. John Lewis (D-Ga.), reported that they had been spat on and slurred by protesters demonstrating against the health reform bill last week.
“Democrats said that they were called the ‘N word,’ which of course would be wrong and inappropriate. But no one has any record of it. No witness saw it, it’s not on camera, it’s not on audio,” she said. “They said that they were spat upon. No one saw it.”

She went on, “There’s a $10,000 reward right now for anyone who can produce a video or an audio. Don’t you think we would have seen a video or an audio by now if there was something out there?”

I see. So, Michele Bachmann would have us believe that John Lewis is a liar. John Lewis, who has demonstrated more integrity, honesty, and courage in his career than Bachmann’s limited intellect can even fathom, is deserving of mistrust, because he heard racial slurs and talked about it. Got it.

Nevermind the point-for-point debunking Steve Benen did in that piece, even qualifying himself for the $10,000 reward.  None of that’s true because Cons don’t wanna believe it, therefore, all evidence to the contrary, it’s not true!!1!11!

[insert fingers in ears, stomp feet, scream loudly]

Aren’t they precious?

And in news of further precious people, my own great state of Washington has a total fuckwit for an AG.  Just thought I’d get that on the record.

Dumbfuckery du Jour

Three things:

I’m waiting for Faux News, the Cheneys et al to call for the immediate torture and detention without civil rights for the terrorists who plotted an attack on American soil.  Alas, holding my breath on this one could cause me to asphyxiate.

The RNC really needs to rethink the “It wasn’t the chairman who spent all that money at the lesbian-themed bondage club, so spending $2000 in contributions for it isn’t so bad!” defense.

And Oklahoma hates teh gayz so much they can’t even be bothered to proofread the legislation they wrote trying to circumvent the Shepard Act.  Congratulations, Oklahoma minorites and religious people: crimes against you now don’t have to be reported to those meddling federal authorities.

All we need now is the clowns pouring out of the car.

Dumbfuckery du Jour

The fundamental stupidity of the Teabaggers is exemplified in a few items today.

First, Steve Benen explores their remarkable ability to remain oblivious to glaringly obvious contradictions:

There’s an old joke that goes something like this: my neighbor went to public schools before joining the military. He went to college on the G.I. Bill, bought his first home through the FHA, and received his health care through the V.A. and Medicare. He now receives Social Security.
He’s a conservative because he wants to get the government off his back.
I mention the joke because a surprising number of right-wing activists don’t seem to appreciate the humor. We talked the other day, for example, about a radical libertarian activist who encourages his allies to throw bricks through the windows of Democratic offices to protest the Affordable Care Act. He hates government involvement in the lives of citizens — but his main income is taxpayer-financed disability checks sent to him every month by the federal government.
This is not uncommon. The NYT reports today on some of the well-intention folks who’ve been caught up in the Tea Party nonsense. Take Tom Grimes, for example.

In the last year, he has organized a local group and a statewide coalition, and even started a “bus czar” Web site to marshal protesters to Washington on short notice. This month, he mobilized 200 other Tea Party activists to go to the local office of the same congressman to protest what he sees as the government’s takeover of health care. […]

“If you quit giving people that stuff, they would figure out how to do it on their own,” Mr. Grimes said.

When Grimes lost his job 15 months ago, one of his first steps was contacting his congressman about available programs that might give him access to government health care. He receives Social Security, and is considering a job opening at the Census Bureau. But in the meantime, Grimes has filled the back seat of his Mercury Grand Marquis with literature decrying government aid to struggling Americans.
 
The same article noted the efforts of Diana Reimer, considered a “star” right-wing activist in her efforts against government programs, a campaign she describes as her “mission.” Reimer, of course, currently enjoys Social Security and the socialized medicine that comes with Medicare.
The cognitive dissonance is rather remarkable.

‘Tis.

I’d like to try a little experiment.  If someone wants the government to stay out of their business, let’s do that.  Let’s have government get right out of their lives.  They won’t even have to pay taxes.  Of course, they’ll lose any and all government benefits, including but not limited to not being able to drive on taxpayer-funded roads, enjoy police and fire services, receive unemployment and/or disability benefits, eat government subsidized food, etc. etc. and so forth.  I give it about 3.1 seconds before they start screaming for government intervention.

As for their screaming about the joys of limited government and howling that they just want us to all live by the Constitution, well, so much for that idea:

Yesterday’s Tea Party rally in Searchlight, NV, for instance, was filled with imagery of the Constitution. Protesters carried signs that read “I honor the Constitution” and “What about the Constitution don’t you understand?” Rally attendee Norman Halfpenny, a 77-year old retired Marine Corps veteran, said, “We need to get our Constitution back.” 
In her speech at the rally, Sarah Palin of course paid homage to the Constitution. “Our vision for America is anchored in time-tested truths that the government that governs least governs best, that the Constitution provides the path to a more perfect union — it’s the Constitution,” she exclaimed. And so it’s extremely puzzling that Palin introduced this new attack line against President Obama yesterday:

In these volatile times when we are a nation at war, now more than ever is when we need a commander-in-chief, not a constitutional law professor lecturing us from a lectern.

Ironically, the crowd cheered wildly at Palin’s line. 

Just take a moment for that one to sink in.  

Yeah.

So, Cons in Congress have to pull some pretty ridiculous stunts to appease these self-contradictory imbeciles.  Such as this one:

The new health care law has an individual responsibility requirement, meaning that every person must have health coverage (or receive an affordability waiver), otherwise he/she will be subjected to a fee. While the Affordable Care Act doesn’t explicitly state that TRICARE — the military’s health program — will meet the individual responsibility requirement, everyone from the chairs of relevant House committees to Veterans Affairs officials to Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) has asserted that TRICARE would meet the requirement. On March 20, the House — out of an abundance of caution — unanimously passed separate legislation affirming that TRICARE will not be affected, and Jim Webb (D-VA) introduced a companion bill in the Senate.
[snip]
The TRICARE fix still isn’t law because Republicans have held it up in the Senate. On Wednesday, Webb asked unanimous consent to approve his bill. Sen. Tom Coburn (R-OK), however, objected. “Let the American people understand the Republicans objected to a matter that could have been fixed by law tomorrow,” said Webb. 

That’s right.  Cons in the Senate are so reflexively anti-Democrat, so whipped by the Teabagging masses, that they shoot down even common-sense, troop-loving measures.

That’s one example among countless ones, of course.  And then there’s their upset at the recess appointments their blind obstructionism forced Obama to make.  They loved them some recess appointments when Bush was in charge.  They also don’t mind voting for Obama’s nominees when their dumbshit holds and filibusters are overcome.  But now their screaming because Obama got tired of their antics.

As always in such matters, Cons have shot themselves right in the foot:

It’s worth fully appreciating the extent to which the president’s move reflects deep animosity. Kevin Drum explained the context of the National Labor Relations Board move, in particular.

Years ago, after Republicans filibustered a Carter nominee to the NLRB, the two parties made a deal: the board would have three appointees from the president’s party and two from the other party. So after he took office Obama nominated two Democrats and one Republican to fill the NLRB’s three vacant seats and got support from a couple of Republicans on the HELP committee for the entire slate. But when it got to the Senate floor John McCain put a hold on Becker, and his nomination — along with the others — died.

Fast forward to today and Obama finally decides to fill the board using recess appointments. But what does he do? He only appoints the two Democrats. This is not what you do if you’re trying to make nice. It’s what you do if you’re playing hardball and you want to send a pointed message to the GOP caucus. You won’t act on my nominees? Fine. I’ll appoint my guys and then leave it up to you to round up 50 votes in the Senate for yours. Have fun.

There are, alas, probably nine Dems in the Senate spineless enough to round out the fifty, but it’s still a nice little message sent, there.  I have to say, I’m very much enjoying the President treating Senate Cons like the terrible two year-olds they are.

There’s no working with people this fundamentally fucked in the head.  There’s no meeting in the middle when you have people who will throw their own ideas away the instant you express an appreciation for them.  There’s no way to hold a discussion with people who can’t understand that accepting government largess is fundamentally at odds with claiming there should be no government largess given to anyone.  You can’t talk rationally with irrational dumbfucks.

The sooner everybody who’s still nominally rational understands that, the sooner we can leave these morons babbling among themselves and get on with the serious business of governing.

Dumbfuckery du Jour

Good job, Cons.  You’ve whipped up the angry mobs.  Let’s see, since the health care reform bill has passed, we’ve had death threats against Bart Stupak, death threats against Kathy Dahlkemper, a cut gas line at Tom Perriello’s brother’s house (because Teabaggers are too fucking stupid to post the correct address), anthrax threats against Anthony Weiner, a Teabagger promising “a thousand little Wacos,” , morons vandalizing Democratic lawmakers’ offices and threatening to kill their kids, and – well, I’m sure there’s plenty I’ve missed, but I’m running out of time.

In the midst of all this, Sarah Palin had a brainwave:

…[O]n Tuesday, Sarah Palin seemed to fan the flames of discontent by labeling a map of vulnerable lawmakers’ districts with crosshairs on her Facebook page and tweeting, “Commonsense Conservatives & lovers of America: ‘Don’t Retreat, Instead – RELOAD!’”

Which John McCain sez happens all the time and is perfectly groovy as far as political discourse from national political figures goes.

Cons, of course, have been simultaneously pretending to condemn the violence whilst egging violent people on.

Oh, and when Eric Cantor tells you that he’s being attacked by angry mobs, too, and in fact he’s being attacked worse because ZOMG people are shooting at him!!1!one!1! – well, let’s just say it might be best if you have a salt block handy:

House Minority Whip Eric Cantor (R-Va.) seemed rather desperate today to characterize this as a bipartisan problem. During a bizarre press conference this morning, Cantor told reporters:

“I’ve received threats since I assumed elected office — not only because of my position, but also because I’m Jewish. I’ve never blamed anyone in this body for that.

“Just recently I have been directly threatened: A bullet was shot through the window of my campaign office in Richmond this week.”

Well, that sounds pretty serious. We’ve heard about plenty of vandalism at district congressional offices this week — all of the cases involve Democrats as targets — but this would be the first reported shooting.
The problem is, what Cantor told reporters wasn’t true. When he said he was “directly threatened,” Cantor was either shamelessly, blatantly lying, or he was popping off to the press about politically-motivated violence without getting his facts straight.
Here’s what happened: early Tuesday morning, someone in the Richmond area fired a bullet into the air. It eventually came down and hit a building — named, of course, the Reagan Building — on the first floor. According to a report from the Richmond Police Department statement, “The round struck with enough force to break the windowpane but did not penetrate the window blinds. There was no other damage to the room, which is used occasionally for meetings by the congressman.”

So, yeah, Eric – shut the fuck up.

Someday, I’d truly love to see Cons grow the fuck up.  Alas, from what I understand of American history, they never were grown, and they’re regressing.  And their hysterical screaming tantrums thrown because they couldn’t get their way are now directly responsible for inciting violence, and could end up getting people killed.

Heckuvajob, Cons.

Dumbfuckery du Jour

For those of us who were wondering just what sort of screaming tantrum the Cons would throw after getting their asses handed to them on a platter, wonder no more:

Arizona Sen. John McCain (R) told the media on Monday about his outrage over the Democratic majority voting to approve legislation they support. He announced that, going forward, he would tell Dems to stay off his lawn refuse to cooperate in the Senate’s legislative process. To punish Democrats for fulfilling their campaign promise to the nation, McCain said, “There will be no cooperation for the rest of the year.”

We saw the manifestation of this pettiness yesterday, when Republicans used an obscure rule to block any Senate hearings from continuing after 2 p.m. Amanda Terkel reports on the developments that are almost too juvenile to believe.

Today, during a Senate Homeland Security Subcommittee hearing on transparency, Sen. Tom Carper (D-DE) announced that he had to stop the proceedings because of Republican blocks. […] 

My my my.  Les enfants terrible strike again. 

If the American electorate rewards these jackasses with a majority again, I swear to fuck I’m leaving the country.  I’ll never be able to look another American in the face ever again.

The Ongoing Bid to Entertain Americans

If the goal of Senate Cons was to turn American government into absurdist theater in the wake of defeat, they’re making a pretty good start of it:

As for Senate Republicans’ next move, Sen. David Vitter, the scandal-plagued far-right Louisianan , offered the GOP’s first two amendments this afternoon. The first is a measure to “repeal the government takeover of health care,” and the second is “prohibiting use of funds to fund ACORN.”
The latter refers to a group that no longer seems to exist.
It sometimes amazes me who actually gets to serve in the world’s most deliberative body.

Indeed.